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Ep. 30: Change




Once again, I have evidence -

JOY does come back.


Can I just climb up on the roof and shout this one little thing?

JOY does come back.

There are sentences that culture tells us are true:

Men need women to be happy and thrive.

Women need men to be safe and purposeful.

Children need to tick boxes to qualify and feel proud.

Once we have enough money,

we can relax.

These were examples my brain offered

of things we have believed in the past

that are not necessarily universal truths for all.

The last 2 1/2 years, all the parts of my life burned.

I adore the analogy of the caterpillar -

literally dissolving every cell of it's body

into a mucusy, gelatinous, goopy soup

and reorganizing each teensy cell into a brand new body -


So, yeah, yesterday was definitely a flying day.


Of course, the day involved a local bookstore.

This is a persistent pattern I adore, in any country, any continent.

Here's some Rumi I picked up under the storefront window,

which describes My Why for writing these blogs:

"What is a real connection between people?

When the same knowledge

opens a door between them."

My Joy Day also involved a date.

Yes, folks, it's happening.

Let the dating begin.

This was the second one, which made the first

NOT an anomaly.

For the first time in 29 years, I am again a dater.

The old has melted and the new is flying.

I date, not because I need someone else to fly,

but because it is enjoyable.

It's fun.

Hmm. FUN does come back, too.

Today's Deep Breath: here's a practical juju nugget, a collective Next Best Decision.

The first book my date pointed out to me was:

Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy,

by David Burns, published in 1980.

(RIGHT?! We so speak the same language.)

I bought it. Here's a clip from the back summary:

"The good news is you can rid yourself of

anxiety, guilt, pessimism, procrastination, low self-esteem,

and other black holes of depression without drugs."

A quick google gets me to a YouTube video:

" our thoughts can shape our lives."

Burns made Cognitive Behavioral Therapy popular.

Fast forward to my JOY Day yesterday,

I took the day off from coaching clients on

how to use CBT to reach goals and reshape their lives.

The universe is small, my friends.

There is room for all of us here.

Let's make room for each other.

Create space for all the differences in humanity

in your mind.

First step: acknowledge that you are worthy of taking up space.

You are worth your own time,

and the time of others.

You are amazing, before you qualify,

before you reach your goals. Today.

Feel that, please.


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