• Tami Lowe

IAmNotBritish, episode twenty-six

Happy Brunch Sunday from Florida, where I raise my mug to all of you. I am grateful for your reading ability and choice. I know you have many screens and voices to choose from. How grateful I am for this opportunity to express myself. There are shudders across my life in response to it. So let's raise our mimosas or mugs and clink a cheers to a bit of connection between work, notices and ads in your inbox.  


Here we go, second quarter.

Every little thing moves on, changes--either gradually or suddenly. As you know, my family has processed the passing of my brother-in-law, Ken, this week. So much effort and so much love went into preserving his life in memory with websites, videos, musical tributes, speeches, and photo books. For him, and for all of us. A truly awesome effort in such a very short amount of time. 

And even that has passed.

Moving on. Back to our socially-distant lives. 

With respect, unless you don't believe in that. Truly, some do not.

What, then, is the role of the believer? How do two opposing beliefs coincide in family, in neighborhoods, in congregations, in schools and in workplaces? 

To shut each other out, or not, that is the question.


I'll use covid19 as an example, for those who feel less comfortable with abstract concepts.

Covid is happening. No one was asked a preference, though the existence of this viruslife brings all kinds of choices that we do have control over. 

Everybody gets to make decisions. That is the RIGHT as humans in this country, or universe, or collection of space.

But

But

But

Nope. We have to accept that everyone gets to make decisions for their own life. No one's life belongs to another. That is a really important sentence. No one's life belongs to another. Worshipper, child, parent, spouse, friend, neighbor, citizen. 

What is she talking about? Of course, we know this. Of course. 

But

We want others to agree with us, to rub our ego lamps and make us feel comfortable.

We want them to be Unquestioning Mirrors.

1.) We want to be RIGHT.

2.) And then we want others to tell us we are RIGHT.


So we choose. We filter, and fluff our opinion pillows.


Change happens. This brings all the feelings and judgments from ourselves (Am I doing the right thing?) and from others. Everyone gets to have an opinion.

But once a decision is made, and the dust settles, we will see clearly and accept that it was the right thing for us at the time.

This is an important piece--making choices is a gift to ourselves!


Today's Deep Breath: (Here's a practical juju nugget, our collective Next Best Decision.)

​Listen to the voice inside of you.

Choosing a different way does not mean that past decisions were a mistake. We made decisions in the past, and they were just decisions at that time. No adjectives. Everyday, we have the responsibility to decide anew.

Maybe 10 years ago, we would have decided to stand with an organization (like the Republicans, or a religion) or a person, but today that does not fit.

Your spirit says, "No, thank you."

You get to decide.

But you can't force others. 

My advice: Reach out instead, if you decide it's worth it. Accept them as a decider, too. If paths fork away from each other as a result of a decision, then just keep moving forward. Every day. That's what life does.


For the love of my life, a soundtrack: Songbird by Fleetwood Mac, written by Christine McVie.

For you, there'll be no more crying. For you, the sun will be shining. And I feel that when I'm with you, It's alright, I know it's right. To you, I'll give the world. To you, I'll never be cold. 'Cause I feel that when I'm with you, It's alright, I know it's right. And the songbirds are singing, like they know the score. And I love you, I love you, I love you, like never before.

And I wish you all the love in the world. But most of all, I wish it from myself. And the songbirds keep singing, like they know the score And I love you, I love you, I love you Like never before, like never before, like never before.


Until next time,

Tami Lowe

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